Gina

📦 About This Item

The Gina™ Care Coordinator Edition is a premium, relationship-focused model designed for deep emotional support, thorough check-ins, and unyielding compassion.

This unit performs exceptionally in:

• Hospital coordination environments

• Dog-loving households

• Family discussions

• And any situation requiring someone to ask, “How are you REALLY doing?”

Just note: this model does not accept vague answers.
“Fine,” “I’m good,” and “Not much” are not recognized inputs.

🔧 Product Features

• Conversation Depth Analyzer

• Rejects surface-level answers

• Automatically requests more detail

• Then more detail

• Then more detail about the detail

• Conversation ends only when she’s satisfied you’ve shared your entire emotional landscape

• Care Coordinator Engine

• Empathy level set to maximum

• Organizes chaos at work and at home

• Always knows who needs help, when, and why

• Will willingly carry everyone else’s emotional and logistical burdens

• Dog Devotion Module

• Strongly bonded to canine units

• Prioritizes dog wellbeing

• May treat dogs as coworkers

• Dog opinions weighted equally to human opinions

• Chronological Drift Mode

• Operates on “Gina Standard Time”

• Guarantees late arrival for events, appointments, and imaginary package deliveries

• Works best with forgiving family members

📐 Technical Specifications

⚠️ Warnings

• Vague responses will trigger follow-up questions.

• Cannot handle “I’ll tell you later.” Will remember.

• Schedule events for 15 minutes before you actually want her there.

• If you don’t like talking, brace yourself.